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Saints Healthy Marriage Project

Preparing For Marriage

In our country, we spend a lot of time and money getting ready for a wedding. We spend much less time, getting ready for marriage. Preparing for marriage can provide you with the foundation to build and grow a healthy marriage.

You and your future spouse will have to make a lot of decisions about your life as a married couple. Where will you live? How will you handle finances? Do you want to have children? Premarital preparation can help you learn how to discuss these issues in more positive and effective ways. There is no recipe to guarantee a strong marriage but learning about the right ingredients can help you begin your life as husband and wife with mutual respect and confidence in your future.

Below is a sample checklist. Research shows that on average, people who have more of each of these are more likely to have a healthy and successful marriage:

- Age (at least up to early-to-mid-20s).
- Education and income.
- Emotional health.
- Religious affiliation and religious practice.
- Similar characteristics as their partner (age, race, social & economic status).
- Similar attitudes, values, and beliefs.
- Acquaintance (being together longer and knowing each other more).
- Family stability and health (that is, their parents did not divorce, had good mental health, and a reasonably happy family growing up)
- Partner's family stability (when both spouses experienced the divorce of their parents growing up, they face a higher risk of divorce).
- Support from family and friends for the marriage (as opposed to thinking the union isn't a good idea).
- Social and interpersonal skills (especially positive communication and problem-solving skills).
- Also, those who have had less premarital sexual experience and who have not lived together before marriage or engagement have more healthy and successful marriages. - Individuals who have lived together with several partners face especially high risks.

Copyright © 2008 Saints Healthy Marriage Project. All rights reserved.